control.

is there a moment when your life feels so bound, so held together by others, and not one portion to call your own? this is one of those days for me. every word uttered, you have to comply. even the silent commands demands your obedience. in frustration i keep trying to be Me, with my rules and my opinions. without trying to please others, with my own boundaries and just to live my life my way. it’s not like i’m tattooing my sacral regions or piercing my nipples (pardon the language, it is a body part though). why is it so hard to do wat i want to do? sigh… why is it beyond me to disregard what people expect? why can’t i just DISobey? because of what i have been taught? because of my innate sense? torn between the flesh and Spirit, for my sanity, for me. sigh…

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