new life!

a butterfly, a sprout, a single mom-med student… all undergo necessary lifestyle changes. we get regenerated. release the old, proclaim the new, possess the future. that is the theme for my church this year. somehow, those words just remained at that. words. words i heard so many times, words that had a nice ring to it, sounded so cool to say. words that had no meaning to my mind. cos my heart hadn’t received it.

release the old. sentiments, memories, even regrets and grudges. there are so many things we hid deep inside, which make us us. we become bitter, from past experiences, or from learning from our role models. so it is with every other character that shapes us. letting it go means letting parts of ourselves go. it means we have to change. we can’t be the bitter person we used to be. but it’s hard to undo something that’s long been second nature to self. so that’s why it is heard but never heeded.

proclaim the new. the uncertain future has so much to offer, yet the unknown scares me. had i known where i would go and when, would that really change things? no. to proclaim wat He has spoken to me about my future, takes all the faith i can muster. i know He said that with all He has planned for me, my future and present, He will confirm with signs and wonders. then i have no way other than to believe and proclaim. to cleave myself from my own plans, and my own thoughts. to change my mindset and response, to lay it at His feet and say Your will be done. then to make it known, to PROCLAIM. it’s a big thing, you know. when u think about it, then it’s not much, but when it sinks deep into your soul, wow. wat a load to offer up. can i, would i?

possess the future. God keeps sending people to tell me, "gene, God has great plans for you. new future and new beginning. God is gonna use you for something great…" it’s like someone lands you a multinational company. u own it. but unless you walk into the office and sit in that big chair, you can’t get your direction or vision into that company. you can’t make it yours. n it’s all good and dandy to say, "i claim it, i’m making it mine." but talk is cheap. if i am gonna possess my future, i gotta start making it happen. work as if the things revealed have already taken place. as if i am all He’s promised i would be. not easy, but it’s gotta happen.

it is amazing; like a breath of fresh air, just a moment of it is never enough. it’s a constant process, to feel fresh and healthy and to calm oneself. so it is with Him. i need that breath of fresh air perpetually. and i depend on it, to become all that i described up there. but it is all so worth it.

i’m not sure if my ramblings have rendered me senile, but to the people who were with me for the leaders’ retreat just this weekend, i know we can tally. more details will come, but this is the ori. the real thing, before sleep sobers me up.

that’s it for now. ciao!

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